Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Breast is best ( when you're in covered up in a bathroom alone and the baby isnt too old)

Kagomae and I
I planned on using a cover, I really did. But then here I was with my hours old sweetie when we were going to have our first visitor (a male) I was nursing her for the second time, i was using a nursing pillow and tried to use a cover. I put it on for a whole five seconds and felt like a freaking circus tent. This isn't a sideshow it is my little girl nursing! I decided right there that this was a beautiful natural thing and other people are going to deal with it. Fast forward 4 months later, dozens of mean looks, ONE nice comment, and one rude DMV employee ( whom will never say anything to a nursing mother again, I went hormonal on her) and pounds and pounds of chunky happy baby later and were still going strong.

I will admit I get sick of the glaring jerk offs, but I sadly admit I used to be them! I have only two distinct memories of women nursing my whole life. One was when I was a kid, and I feel like if my mother had taken a moment to talk about why she was doing that and that it wasn't gross then I would have had a lifetime of different thoughts about it. The second time i was waitressing and i wasn't grossed out, i just remember thinking the kid was too old. Blah, I hate that I was so uninformed my whole life and with my first child. But now I'm an advocate for breastfeeding acceptance.
Breastfeeding grosses people out (Americans mostly) Why though? We are a hyper sexual culture whose media forms our sexuality in a big way. Breasts being sexually attractive is a learned behavior not human instinct. Countries like Bali are good examples. They are not sexual organs!  Some people like feet, yet we don't all wear socks with flip flops and gag when we see a painted toe.

So, how to deal with the sheer ignorance and meanness of peoples reactions to nursing in public( or in your home, god forbid)Everyone says smile and continue nursing but what I want to do is say "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GLARING AT?!" or  "I bet you use that mouth of yours in a sexual context, yet I still see it flapping a -freakin' -way" I think I need to take the middle ground and just be prepared and stop and talk to people about why it makes them uncomfortable. I yelled at that lady at the DMV, but her opinion didn't change, now she just knows the laws and is probably scared to ever try that again. So thats a good thing, but maybe I should have informed her a little so she had a new paradigm of thought about it. I feel for women who feel self conscious and will never breastfeed in fear of societies reaction. I feel for women that feel that they HAVE to use a cover, as it is a choice not a requirement. I want people to know that breast is best even when its in public and whats not best is feeling shunned and ridiculed.
On a final note, I am far more disgusted at the large amounts of dead flesh and milk from other animals in your cart than my  little one getting the nutrition she needs. And you don't see me barking and glaring(or judging) at your family!
Remember that your forming peoples opinions and reactions by exposing them to a little bit of nature and that the more people that see it, the more babies that might get 'the good stuff' :)


  1. wow, absolutely agree! it is also an issue in Hungary. Too bad, but I don't care. It is their problem, not mine. I am NOT going to stay in the hous with my baby in case see wants to eat! And, YES I am nursing a two-year old! and yes, if she wants, in public... :)

  2. I totally agree! I used to whip my boob out wherever we were! Granted, I never had anyone say anything to me though, which they're lucky I didn't! I breastfed my son until he was 9 months old and at that time Carter decided he was done breastfeeding by himself (I actually got mastitis because of that decision of his!). My husband and I wish we could have done it a full year if not longer! So many of my friends have their babies on formula right off that bat. Why don't those parents feeding their young babies bottles in public get ridiculed? Formula is proven not to even come close to that of breastmilk! I swear it's the only reason my son has not been sick since the day he was born, 14 months ago!