Saturday, June 16, 2012

The former Judgey Moms are evolving into Discerning Mommas

 dis·cern·ing  (d-sûrnng, -zûr-)
Exhibiting keen insight and good judgment; perceptive.

dis·cerning·ly adv.

When we were thinking about starting our blog, we would regularly visit Baby centers facebook page and give advice to mothers with questions that  are relevant to our experiences and base of knowledge. These women seemed not to like getting advice that was different then they were doing, and like people do, they got defensive. They called us names, such as judgey moms. We thought, if being judgmental means then trying to advocate natural,peaceful parenting, then SIGN US UP! We decided to embrace that and thought other parents might understand where we are coming from, a place of people getting defensive and thinking your're judgmental, when in actuality you have everyone's best interest at heart.

 We are Buddhists and Buddhism really speaks out against, hate, anger, and judgment. What I've realized is that we aren't trying to be "judgey", we are trying to be discerning as possible. There is a distinct difference between judgment and discernment. Discernment means perceiving the way things are, period. Judgment is what we add to discernment when we make a correlation  between how things and people in the world are. It is  hard as we all know to keep negative judgment at bay, especially when childrens' well being is at stake.Start with a persons dissatisfaction over another persons decisions and mix in our desire for them to be otherwise and then you will surely feel a slew of negative emotions. I need to clear my mind of all preconceived thoughts and notions and start advocating with a blank mind, a discerning one. 

A 'discerning mind' comes from a peaceful place, from a nonreactive place, and ‘judging mind’ comes from a reactive place. But there has to be a middle ground, I mean even Buddha himself sometimes criticized the teachings of the Brahmins of his day, which means he judged they were wrong. There has to be a middle way, in every situation. For example, you see a child being abused and you judge that this is wrong, and you are able to stop it, then you probably will. I think for the state of my spiritual and physical progress I need to find that middle ground in my promotion of informed parenting. I feel like I have to judge corporations and money(not people and their actions) through my advocation,hopefully that is a good middle ground?

This brings me to  our news.We are not 'Judgey' but are promoting good judgment. We want more moms to feel welcome,and not put off by our name. We understand why we used the name "The Judgey Moms" but does everyone else? I  am passionate about families living beautiful,healthy, happy lives and I don't know if anyone can receive that energy with our current name. It has served its purpose in our lives, we feel our blog needs to follow our intentions and life experiences. We feel as if we parent 'with good judgment' and want to encourage others to open up to the wealth of knowledge mothers inherently own. We want you to realize you have your childs best interest at heart, no pharmaceutical corporation or  government organization can match a mothers instinct and capacity of love. 

We will be changing our blog name to Discerning Mommas and hope you understand and will join us! 

p.s-the new blog will be up in the next week and we PROMISE this is the only time we will be doing this :)

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